Dear Lord, I feel I must tell you I need a "brake", Just how many mushrooms can one soul take. Watch your "sizing" and "marked ones" God sake watch the "weights", Don't send one extra mushroom in those bloody green crates. There's one pounds and half pounds, six pounds for the shop, Must keep Marshall happy so give him the top. There's stragglers and buttons and family pack too, Some go in the bucket what can I do.
My trolley is creaking, it can't hold no more, Then suddenly a bang, they're all on the floor. I struggle to gather them and save what I can, But the biggest majority has gone down the pan. My boss is not happy for I stacked them too high He rolls up his eyes and gives a deep heavy sigh. "He thinks" there's no point in talking -she'll do it again, So I must think of something to make her refrain." Then he puts up more shelving; it slows me right down, Now I'm picking them from up there and not off the ground.
The overhead tunnel has now got a drip, The floor is all "squelchy" no running "I'll slip". I could end up in hospital with my legs around my neck, Doctors "poking" and "prodding", Oh what the heck! It's no worse than a sore bum after a very long day, Aches and pains in my body -I'm thinking sick pay.
It's then that I see it, the boss scratches his head, "Oh hell" its more of that green mould coming up in the bed. He says "you just be careful in what you send down, For Monaghan will cut me 2p in the pound. It's "a fag" I am thinking and I need a rest, This poor mushroom picker can only do her best.
Lord was it my imagination or did I hear you say, That when I abandoned my work mates, They had to work a long day. And that I haven't done my penance yet ten years is not enough, For my feeble excuses and bad jokes and swear words "that's tough". So where's my navy overall, plastic gloves and my orange knife, It seems I'll be picking mushrooms for the rest of my life. Now I'm looking forward to I'm sixty-five, For the law says I must retire, I hope I'm still alive.
So tea break is over girls, there's work to be done, There's stretching and picking and thinning "it's fun". Just think of the money at the end of the day, With an extra large envelope to hold all your pay. Now have a happy Christmas and a peaceful New Year, All tanked up and rested to go into top gear. For if I know our Anthony no doubt he'll have a plan, There'll be more "flushes and flushes" and I don't mean down the pan!
